The other day, I was called to a family who just lost a loved one. It was an intense time, as some of these encounters can be. But as I walked into the room, I quickly realized that this family did not share the same moral values or religious outlook as I did. The question that confronted me was, "As a chaplain, do you have to agree with everyone and thus share compassion towards lifestyles we disagree with?"

Compassion is more than sympathy, and it's more than empathy. As some have pointed out, compassion is empathy in action. It is not only choosing to feel what another person is feeling but to step in and join them. For chaplains, as people of faith, the question is, can we join in another's grief situation when we find the reason for the grief contrary to our faith?

As a government chaplain, I work in a pluralistic environment where my co-workers and the people I minister to do not always share the same worldview as myself. I sometimes see their suffering because of the personal choices they have made or because of the world views they hold. But they are human, and because of this, I recognize that they are loved by God. And because of that, I am compelled to care.

Here are a few thoughts:

1. We are called to care. We don't have to condone certain behaviors or worldviews, but we still care to the best of our abilities. This does not mean you compromise your faith, worldview, or outlook based on the situation or person.

2. We hate to see people suffer for reasons of their lifestyle choice. But in the short time we have them in the emergency environment, we need to be realistic about what is possible and legal in our employment context. The emergency scene is not a place to preach morality. That will turn people away faster than anything and most likely remove you from your chaplain position. And that will serve nobody. As a chaplain, can you help the person without condoning the behavior, lifestyle choices, or worldview?

3. As chaplains, integrity to our faith is the highest calling. When ministering brings about compromise, we lose our integrity and are no better than a secular counselor. Still, our ethics as a chaplain state that we will try to get the person's help, even if it means that help comes from somewhere else.

As a chaplain, I cannot prevent people from suffering, but maybe through the caring touch of a chaplain, I can gently help prevent them from suffering for the wrong reasons. I don't have to agree with and share compassion for people's lifestyle choices, but I do need to show compassion for the human condition. While I may disagree with why they are suffering, I can still care because they are suffering, and maybe I can affect their worldview in the process.